Caden's ears.

If you have a child with special needs, you soon come to realize that there is that "thing" that becomes the "thing" that's terribly frustrating. For Caden, medically speaking, that is ear infections. He is home again from school, day 2 now, with a high fever and lethargy. Most likely cause? Ears. And this is the 2nd round of it in as many weeks.

And I'm also annoyed at his ENT. I called them first to see if he could be seen instead of asking his regular doc to see him again. "It's too difficult to tell from your description if it's ears or not - but let us know if it IS his ears because we'll want to see him." ARGH! I truly DO know my son well enough to tell you what's going on but nope, they couldn't see us. So our regular dr (God bless that man) just called in a prescription for us and Caden seems better today.

In other news, I am 27 weeks today. Still feeling good, nesting like a CRAZY woman. Today I cleaned out the closet off the laundry room, cleaned the pantry (didn't organize yet, just cleaned it), sorted through all the craziness we call Tupperware (anyone need some onion holders? I am so a minced-from-the-jar kind of cooker) and cleaned out the cabinet where we put all the small appliances. Felt good, too! Avery and James spent the morning at preschool together - it was Ave's snack day and they had a good time.

A funny for your mid-week.

Hats off to my dear friend Mindi, the one girl who always knows what she sends into my email inbox will literally make me Laugh Out Loud!! This gem came from her:


Loving Couple -

A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary on the beaches in Montego Bay, Jamaica. Their domestic Tranquility had long been the talk of the town. People would say, “What a peaceful & loving couple.” The Local newspaper reporter was inquiring as to the secret of their long and happy marriage.
The Husband replied: “Well, it dates back to our Honeymoon in America,” explained the man. “We visited the Grand Canyon, in Arizona , and took a trip down To the bottom of the canyon, by horse. We hadn't gone too far when my wife's horse stumbled and she almost fell off. My wife looked down at the horse and quietly said, 'That's once.' We proceeded a little further and her horse stumbled again. Again my wife quietly said, 'That's twice.' We hadn't gone a half mile when the horse stumbled for the third time my Wife quietly removed a revolver from her purse and shot the horse dead.”
I SHOUTED at her, '”What's wrong with you, woman!?!”
“Why did you shoot the poor animal like that, are you frickin crazy?”
She looked at me, and quietly said, “That's once.”
“And from that moment on.... We have lived happily ever After.”

God never ceases to amaze me.

Had my regular 4 week appointment with the perinatologist this morning - mostly a fetal growth ultrasound. These little girls - verified girls once again - are doing PERFECTLY. They are active (baby B is quite a bit more rowdy than baby A) and they look wonderful. They are measuring just 2oz different from each other, which means they are both growing at nearly identical rates. Baby B is slightly bigger at 1lb 15oz and baby A is weighing in at 1lb 13oz. The level of fluid surrounding them looks good as well. I had tears in my eyes, I am just so thankful for God continually showing me that He is in control and He has a perfect plan for these double surprises. The perinatologist came in and literally spent about 30 seconds with me - "everything looks wonderful, your risk of twin-to-twin transfusion is nearly gone at this point, though we'll still watch carefully for that, keep on doing well and I'll see you in another 4 weeks." Hallelujah! So I've moved on to every 2 weeks with my regular doctor (mostly to keep good tabs on my blood pressure and thinks like that) and will have another growth ultrasound in 4 weeks.

In other news, please welcome little James (RTS) and his family to my blogroll! Head on over and visit his blog and tell me he doesn't look just like our Caden!

Had another appt on Friday

Things seem pretty normal I guess. We were able to find both heartbeats (this was just an appt with my regular dr, not with the perinatologist for an ultrasound and more in-depth look) and heard a lot of movement as well. I asked my dr if it was common to be more anxious when pregnant with twins about all the possibilities of things that might go wrong and he reassured me that it was more common. I felt better about that, but I am truly trying to give it to God and not fret about things - easier said than done! Anyway, I have been measuring about 2-3 weeks ahead but on Friday I measured 5 weeks ahead...and off I went in my head, thinking that must mean there's too much amniotic fluid for one twin (meaning twin to twin transfusion), etc. We'll see on Wed morning when I have my ultrasound, but I could use prayers that everything is just fine. I also had my glucose test Friday morning and passed with flying colors, although I am anemic and need to take an iron tablet daily. I can do that!

Things around the house are interesting. I have been nesting quite a bit and want to get to a place where I have nothing to do at night because I am *that* caught up. I know, I will give you a moment to stop laughing. However, several of my friends have been doing this lately and say it's so freeing. I can only imagine!! James has been a peach about pitching in lately and that is such a huge help to me, especially on those days when I am extra tired or extra grumpy, lol.

Caden is recovering nicely from his ear infection. I need to make an appt with his ENT to have his ears checked again, but sometimes I just don't FEEL like making more appts (and you RTS mommas know what I am talking about there). He went back to school on Friday and they said he did great, even went swimming with his special ed class. He's back to his usual self, antagonizing Avery at every turn. It's nice to have him back. (kinda??)

Avery is...something. We're not sure what is going on specifically, and maybe it's normal 4yo stuff, but she is a crybaby and she is DEFIANT lately. When things don't go her way we get 20 minutes of full-out sobbing about life in general. We get sass when the answer to her request is "no" - and then more crying. To be perfectly honest, it has spiraled downhill since we have been preparing for the twins. Everyone tells me "Oh, she'll be such a big help" but I gotta tell you, she might be my biggest challenge! It's such a fine line between letting her have her way so she's happy and laying down the law because she can't always have her way. I guess it's about choosing your battles, but sometimes I wonder why everything HAS to be a battle in the first place!

Declan is crawling. It's slow, but it's OH so cute. He started last week sometime in pursuit of a much desired sippy cup. It was worth the 15 month wait! He's also been half-standing near things lately so he's just sort of taken off all at once. He adores getting into cupboards and I let him - he is entertained and James can pick it up later, hee hee. He went through a spell there where he was pretty difficult, but I think it had more to do with not being able to motate and always seeing the same scenery. That's not an issue now!

Caden's got a bad ear infection.

Something hasn't been right since Sunday or so. They've been saying at school that he is very disagreeable to doing things, which isn't usual. Then last night he was awake until 9:30 crying and finally passed out on James' lap in front of 24 (I know, such good viewing for a 6 year old, sometimes that non-verbal stuff pays off). He was then up during the night sobbing. I sent him to school and he was agreeable about it, but I called after picking Avery up from preschool at 11:30 and was told that he wasn't himself at all and had been laying on a special person's lap for the past 45 minutes. Time for a call to the dr and to pick him up from school. Turns out, it's a nasty ear infection (and both ear tubes are out, oh joy, I think now we'll be going to tube set #4) causing him to be so sick, poor boy! I have had to carry him for most of the day, and at 45 pounds and me "great with child(ren)" that is no easy task. So he stays home tomorrow, and I had plans to get things done that I have been neglecting but such is the life. Can anyone run to Wal-Mart for me in the morning?? :)

Kristen's blog address:

If you'd like to follow Kristen and her identical twins, feel free to visit her blog at www.rockyrieman.blogspot.com (and can anyone tell me how to make that a clickable link????). Keep praying for them please!!

I haven't forgotten about you, blog...

I have just been busy with everything and nothing, all at the same time. You know how that goes? You don't have anything on the calendar, yet your days are full of "stuff." Add that to the fact that I have been nesting like a crazy-momma and we keep busy around here!

I finally talked Caden and Avery into watching The Polar Express and I am getting a few minutes' peace. Declan is napping, bless him. He's always been a very good napper, I'm glad of it and I hope it continues for YEARS, lol.

Twins are doing well. My blood pressure has risen a bit, and I have more protein and ketones in my urine than I should AND I've been losing weight. I had to go into the clinic twice this week to have that all checked, but for now we're just keeping an eye on things and I go for my next regular appt a week from today. I'll be glad to have my next ultrasound as well, just to check on them and see how they're doing. I don't feel a TON of movement, actually not more than I did with any of my first 3 singleton pregnancies, so at times it's easy to worry that something might be wrong. There's just lots of unknowns with a twin pregnancy I guess, and sometimes that's disconcerting, to say the least.

Please keep my friend Kristen in your thoughts and prayers. We met via searches on the internet - she lives in Wyoming and is also pregnant with twins (identical). Right now she has traveled over 7 hours to go to Salt Lake City because her twins are in the beginning stages of Twin-to-Twin Transfusion Syndrome. Keep praying that they will be able to help the twins grow strong and healthy!!!!

Think Caden's retarded?

You're right. Think it's ok to use the word "retard(ed)" outside of a medical description? You're wrong.

When you saw the title to my post I bet you wondered how to feel. You wondered if I was joking or if I was serious. I'm serious. Caden is considered mentally retarded. Problem is, in this society, which claims to embrace and encompass those with any kind of disabilities, the word "retard" has been changed to mean stupid, and is typically flung around as an insult at those with normal cognitive levels. No one wants to be CALLED a "retard" but yet it's fine to say "that's retarded" about something. No one wants to be CALLED a "retard" yet it's acceptable to say "you're retarded" if you're just joking around with someone.

Today, I am asking you to change the way you feel about this word. It's used as an insult, and it degrades those who are mentally handicapped. It's not "fine" to use it as long as you're not talking about a person, because it perpetuates the stereotype that people who are mentally retarded are somehow stupid and incapable. Let's end the use of this word altogether. If you use it, will you please stop? If you don't but you hear it used, are you brave enough to say something? Today, March 31 2009 is the day to end using the word "retard(ed)". It's not about being oversensitive. It's about respect for all. http://www.r-word.org/

You take the good with the bad!

No, I'm not talking about the facts of life. I'm talking about developmental milestones. They are wonderful little marvels to brag about and enjoy experiencing with each new child, but they are also intrusions into life as you know it.

Take today for example. Declan is now quite adept at getting from a laying position to a sitting position (it only took 14 months). Problem is, now he sits up in his crib instead of napping. Hey, isn't seeing the world from a sitting position more fun? He thinks so. He's been in there for nearly 1.5 hours and is still just talking away. He NEEDS to sleep, but I suppose I'll get to enjoy that later, around suppertime when he's a total bear to handle. He is growing increasingly frustrated at not being able to crawl around, but I think moving to the sitting position has built up confidence in him.

I told James around the 1st of March that Declan would crawl "this month". Well, unless he really gets a move on today and tomorrow that is unlikely. Wait, he's probably crawling all over in his crib right now and I have no idea!

And now onto my next random thought - decorating. I need some help with something. I got this beautiful mirror and thingys (are they sconces? I don't know what they're called but they hold candles I think - so candle holders? I'm clueless.) at a garage sale this past summer. James finally hauled out his tools and put them up for me:

Very nice above our fake fireplace (though last summer's appraiser listed that we indeed had a fireplace...I'm not sure where he received his credentials) but I'm wondering a few things. First, should I take the mirror out and paint them a bolder color? They seem really bland on that light tan wall. I don't feel like painting it but I would. Also, I am ordering red/white checked curtains for the windows (there are windows equally spaced on either side of the fireplace) so maybe that'll make this pop more. Also, what the heck do I stick on the candle holders? Before you laugh and shout out the obvious, keep in mind that these holders are curved throughout, so flat-bottomed candles won't work. I was thinking of some spheres that have greenery hanging down from them but again, where on earth to get them? Any ideas??

Edited to add a pic of the curtains I'm ordering:

Another ultrasound this morning!

Things look very good in there. It's just amazing to see what God is creating, changing every time! Today both twins are head down (hooray!) but through the course of the ultrasound they moved a ton, so head down was a matter of that moment in time. They are busy little girls! The perinatologist agreed that there has only ever been one placenta and everything still strong points to identical twins. I had to have my cervix length checked (it SOUNDS a lot worse than it is) and for those of you who might know, it was nearly 5cm (anything over 2.5cm is good, so again, hooray!). Baby A still has the 2 vessel cord but it doesn't sound like anything to be concerned about. They were laying so so so so close to each other, you could see they were both girls in one frame! The tech said that doesn't happen too often. Also wanted to add that I am 22 weeks today!

In other news, just before I came over to blog Declan was rolling around, and when I looked over at him a few minutes later he was sitting up! Yay! He's spending more time standing up too (with us holding him of course) and getting stronger with stuff like that. Still likes to scream and shriek and is very "talky".

Not much new to report with Caden or Avery. They seem to be just plugging along.

Kids and heaven

We've been talking recently around here about heaven. It makes sense, as James' grandpa (our kids' Opa) passed away at midnight last night (we will miss you Opa, we love how you loved kids), but interestingly enough, the first questions about heaven came in the car one day from Avery. Avery told me that she wanted Jesus to come to our house so she could give him a hug. I told her that wasn't the way Jesus came to us now, but he used to in the days of the Bible. That seemed to be ok with her, but she wanted to know where Jesus was if he wasn't able to come to our house...I mean, isn't he everywhere?? I tried to explain that he was in heaven but he also lives in our hearts, and again, that seemed to pacify her, but I could tell she wasn't satisfied completely.

Last night over our McDonald's dinner (hey, it's the only "meat" Declan will eat) we talked to the kids about how Opa was not going to live here on earth anymore. We told them that his body was very sick and that very soon, his body wouldn't be strong enough to stay here. God would choose the time and God would choose how it all happened, so we didn't need to worry about it. Avery insisted on going to make him feel better so that he would start to eat again and get well. We told her it didn't work that way, when God chooses for someone to die they will die, it's not up to us and there's nothing we can do.

This afternoon it came full circle. I told the kids this morning when we woke up that Opa had died. Several hours later, just a few minutes ago, Avery told me that Jesus was going to give OPA a hug, that's how it worked.

It's always amazing to me how God works in their hearts...to give us glimpses of him, to answer any lingering questions or doubts we may have, and to show us that children truly understand more than we even imagine.

So I thought my life was over...

turns out Iowa has changed their laws in July on how long you can wait until you need to renew your driver's license. I checked mine out yesterday while shopping and it expired March 7....2008!!!!!!!!! So when I got home I read everything I could find online (and you know that everything online is gospel) and they all agreed that in Iowa if you're over a year expired you have to take the written test AND the driving test to get your license back. I had visions of not driving for weeks. It took me THREE tries to pass it when I was a teen trying to get my license! This can't be good.

James in all his ever-frustrating-to-me calmness told me to relax, don't worry about it, you don't know what will happen, etc. So this morning I called our county seat's driver's license place. And, the regulations changed...you now have 1 year PLUS another 60 days to renew without having to take any tests again!! Oh I am just overjoyed!!!! Lesson learned. Please check the expiration date on your driver's license!

I have to document this - Declan.

He stood up today (I was holding him under his armpits and he was between my legs as I was sitting in the chair)!!!!!!! But he actually placed both feet on the floor and beared weight on those little chunkers for like 20 seconds!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Go Declan!

Have you missed me?

I feel like I've missed myself. We were gone over the weekend to Wisconsin Dells for the annual Midwest RTS reunion. It was honestly the most fun I've had in a long time as we could just relax and let the kids swim (the pool was wonderful for little ones because you didn't have to be in there with them) while we talked with other groovy grownups who also have RTSweeties! It was good for us to see Caden in his element - around tons of people who embraced him and loved him for exactly who he is. We both said we were very proud of him. We realize now that he is an EXCELLENT communicator. School has been telling us this, telling us that Caden tries in EVERY possible way to communicate and does eventually get his point across. He's very interactive, very VERY sociable. It was just fun to observe him! And his RTS brothers and sisters? Ahhhhhhhhhhhdorable.

The weather here just stinks. Sure, the days are longer but there's no sunshine and it's windy and FREEZING - literally. Who's ready for spring with me? Doesn't help that I am nesting already and wanting to get a TON done. When it finally warms up I will be too big and uncomfortable to do anything. Harumph.

Today is the halfway point of the dating of this pregnancy. I am 20 weeks today. Hard to believe it's only been 5 weeks since we found out it was twins, and just 3 weeks since we found out about them both being girls. It's especially hard to believe when you see the amount of clothing I have already accumulated. Now, in my defense a LOT of it has been gifts...turns out I am not the only one who thinks shopping for identical twin girls sounds like fun!

On the mend!

I think the littles here are getting back to normal. Caden was retching over the garbage can at lunch (I can't even TELL you how proud I was of him for running to that when he thought he had to throw up, hooray!) but I think he again just ate too quickly and was too hungry to think about slowing down. He spit out some of his hot dog during that ordeal and when he went to put it back in his mouth it was MY turn to retch over the garbage can. Gracious kid, that was sick. But I need to figure out how to best communicate with school that he doesn't need to come home every time he vomits, especially when he throws up during eating times. I think it's some of the old reflux issues rearing their ugly heads. (Lynnae, I am very sorry for this entire vomituous paragraph. You're probably retching now, huh?)

Avery looks pretty pale but she's been the healthiest of the bunch really. Other than her sasspot mouth, nothing seems ill about her.

Declan is just plain fussy. I think he's over the pukes and over the big fever, but he is certainly not over being a grouch. Pretty certain it's teeth - I see at least 4 molars and a few other teeth poking through, not fun!

Today is our usual respite day (break for mommy) and "Grandma Jean" typically comes right before Caden gets off the bus. But today she's coming early and I'm excited to get out!

One, two, THREE strikes you're out!

Declan has a shirt from Baby Gap (no more comments on my shopping, tyvm) that says this. I really should have him wearing it today. No, he'd probably throw up on it.

Yes, that's right, I have not one, not two but THREE kids home sick today. Declan started on Saturday with a 103 fever, Sunday with vomiting. Avery threatened to vomit Sunday night but never did. I got at call at 12:30 today to come get Caden from Kindergarten because he'd thrown up all over. Excellent! And now Declan is sobbing in his crib because he's all out of sorts with naptime and all of that. I really don't feel like dealing with any of them today (there's that honesty again). But I will, mostly because no one else wants to and I really need us all healthy for this weekend - we're going to Wisconsin Dells to the annual Midwest RTS Reunion, exciting times!

If I had to be honest...

and I know this is always the best policy, I'd tell you that I am already shopping pink and subsequently hunting down the matching pieces to coordinate. So help me if a penis shows up on the next ultrasound. Shopping is my therapy. It is what helps me to focus and think and process and all of that. It may sound bizarre to some of you but it truly grounds me. Honesty again - I used to use shopping as a way to make myself feel better about things, anything. I would shop so that I could have nice things and feel better about myself. I shopped for all kinds of reasons, none of which had anything to do with me actually NEEDING stuff. But I have worked through that with some help and I am glad to say that I can still enjoy shopping without having it be something I'm addicted to. (Mt. Dew on the other hand is a totally different story.)

I am a pretty avid onliner. So I belong to several message boards, some huge, some very small. Some of my best friends I feel are online, people I've never met but I've already witnessed that they would do anything in their power to help me out and they pray for me and all of that. It's pretty neat. And then there are the huge message boards, where people don't get to know you as intimately but they have their advantages as well - namely the huge board I am on that is dedicated to Gymboree clothing. If you know me, you know I like that brand. But what's so awesome about this board is there's a huge Buy/Sell/Trade section and I get nearly 100% of my kids' clothes here at garage sale prices, yes, even including shipping. And it's so huge that I can buy one outfit for the twins that I love, then put up an ISO (In Search Of) for another of the same outfit and chances are, I will find it and get it, both for less than I might pay for one outfit at Wal-Mart. The thrill of the hunt is really what this board is about (plus there are some awesome gals there who do super sweet things for you) and I enjoy it! It's like a garage sale right on the screen, changing every minute.

I know people have asked me how I can afford Gymboree, etc. Truth be told, I can't afford Gymboree if you're talking about going in to the store and shopping from the racks. But who can't afford garage sales? Honestly, I can't afford to pass it up!

It's IDENTICAL twin GIRLS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Or at least they are 99% sure, lol. After figuring out they were both girls, then they started looking for placentas. At my last u/s with them they said 2 placentas. Today - just one so the tech figured she didn't see it right last time. The perinatologist came and and looked - again, both girls and one placenta. I was praying for a girl and then to get two, hooray!!!! They do have separate sacs, but they said the membrane between them is "thin and flimsy". I have absolutely no idea what that means, or if that's good or bad, or how exactly they can tell they are identical already, but I figure a perinatologist knows what he's talking about! They are measuring nearly identically at this point, within an ounce of each other which is very good - twins who share one placenta often have more issues or could have more possible issues, so we'll be watching that closely (twin to twin transfusion is the biggest worry). Anatomically everything looks perfect and I am just excited now!! IDENTICAL TWIN GIRLS, omgoodness, I see oodles of matching Gymboree!!!!!!

I am completely sporadic with this thing lately.

I don't really forget so much as I don't have time. I have a feeling that is going to be my mantra starting in a few months. Or maybe blogging will be a welcome relief. I have no idea, trying not to think that far ahead.

Ok so guess what's exciting? Tomorrow morning at oh-dark-thirty we have our big ol ultrasound for these babies!! To be technical it's at 7:15, but that is early to me. My dad, bless his heart, is coming out here by 6:45 to stay with the kids and get Caden off to school for us while we're there. I would have had James just stay home and do all of it but he already missed the ultrasound where she told me we were having twins, he's NOT going to miss the one where they tell us what they are! If you ask Avery, it's one boy and one girl. She is ADAMANT about that. James and I really think it's one of each as well, or I think it *might* be two girls, but I'm just positive it's not two boys. Time will tell!

Oh and if you wanna know, call us or check back here. I am not paying $300 again. Nevah.

Our first clue as to how expensive twins can be

came in our online statement for our cell phone bills. Many of you know that we use cell phones exclusively, we do not have a landline/house phone at all. Which typically works out great. Typically. However, our usual phone bill is going to be $210 MORE than usual, payable in early March for, you guessed it, the dates over which we found out about the twins. So those of you who found out bright and early, we must think you're pretty worth it. Literally. Cha-ching.