My appointments today!

Today I started off the morning with my routine every-4-weeks ultrasound. My mom came along with me this morning and it was fun to share that with her! She's never seen an ultrasound happening before so it was a good time. No doubts anymore that I'm fibbing about there being 2 in there - I have a witness. :)

I'm 31 weeks today. The girls measured 3lbs 7oz and 3lbs 8oz (+/-10oz, lol) and they are both in position to try vaginal delivery, woo hoo!!! (Mostly I'm a weiner about a possible c-section.) The perinatologist said it doesn't get much more picture perfect than this. He doesn't want to see me back with him for another 4 weeks for another ultrasound, which would make me 35 weeks, wow!

My reg dr (saw him about an hour after the peri) said that the peri must be feeling REALLY comfortable with how things are going or he would have never allowed me to wait so long between ultrasounds, so this is good! At my reg appt I gained 3 pounds (up 19 pounds total), bp was excellent at 110/54, fetal heart tones were both found easily again. I am going every 2 weeks and have been for quite a few weeks already. Get ready for this - I am measuring 40-41 weeks gestation at 31 weeks. For those of you that have no idea what I'm talking about, 40 weeks is a full-term single baby. So I am as big as if I had one baby in there and I was ready to deliver. And alas, I have weeks and weeks to go/grow yet! I got into the minivan after camping this weekend and had to move the seat back - so over the course of 3 days I know I grew quite a bit. Of course it had nothing to do with the number of smores I had. Hey, one for each beating heart inside me, yes??

Declan's 1 year portraits...

taken at 16+ months, today 5/26/09. It's WITHIN the age of 1 year, yes?

Click here to see the pictures

password: declan

And Caden knocks my socks off!

Just when God thought I had been wallowing long enough in my pity party, He sent a huge gift via my firstborn.

Tonight James had to leave for church a little early, which left me with all the kids when I already wasn't feeling very well at all. Before James left, Caden had taken his diaper off and was running around stark naked, nothing new there. I happened to be sitting on our bed and Caden came into our bedroom, pointing at his bottom, grimacing and whining. "Caden, do you need to go potty?" "NO!" came the immediate reply, which is his FAVORITE word these days, so joyous. So I change it up a bit. "Caden, do you need a diaper on?" "Yeah!" to which I replied, "No buddy, let's go sit on the potty." He grabbed my hand and I sat him on our toilet in our master bathroom. I showed him how to point it down and he was NOT impressed with mommy bugging him there, so I was pushed aside. I decided to take a step away and not really pay attention, and there is was, the sound of pee hitting the floor. WHO THE GLORY CARES, it's urine, it came from Caden and it was nearly immediate after being placed on the potty!!!!!!!!!!!!! So I started whooping it up and all of that, walking back toward him to get ready to wipe up the pee when HOLY SMACK, poop hit the water!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A double whammy of goodness!!! We were all so proud, SO PROUD!!!!

I got him wiped up (I thought) and we headed to start getting ready for bed. He decided to make a detour into Avery's room (still naked) and climb up on her bed. I called for him from his bedroom when it dawned on me - he scoots himself to dismount a bed and I'm not totally sure his bottom is clean....please don't tell Avery anything but we need to do some laundry in the morning.

One of those RTS days, I guess.

And yesterday, RTS stood for "Really Tough Sh!t".

It was Mother's Day. And I am admittedly grouchy and punchy lately. I probably have hurt some feelings and have a few apologies to make but at the moment the best I can do is to admit I am bitchy and move on from there.

The kids actually let me sleep in (James had to be at church early) so that was a VERY nice gift! I got up with them and we got ready for church and Caden was alredy somewhat agitated once we got to church because daddy had to go up front to sing during our service and wasn't sitting with us. He was asking for "daaaaaaaadddddy!!" and whining some, but then it came time for him to leave for Children's Worship and all was well. We made it through and then went to family's house for lunch together which was very nice. I think my neice may have broken her arm but I haven't heard from SIL so I am going to assume that she's ok for now.

After lunch we had decided to take a 1 hour + drive to see a campground that James and I will be camping at (without children!!) in a few weeks. We wanted to see what the campground was like and all of that. That went fine until James decided it was Caden's turn to hold the personal DVD player instead of Avery (who usually holds it in such a way that she and Caden can both see it and does a very nice job of it). Caden doesn't do such a nice job of it. He pushes the button to turn the screen off and on. He turns it away from Avery (which elicits an hugely unnecessary shrieking fit from her) and he just generally does what he can be to a pistol about it. Now, I understand that it might not seem "fair" that Caden never gets to hold it, but honestly, he cannot handle it. And I in turn cannot handle the subsequent hollering from Avery (again, not necessary but she's female and 4, what do you expect?) and general extreme referreeing I have to do. But I must say, with Avery I can reason with her and she understands the concept on consequence - and we made it very clear that if she kept hollering she would not be having any sort of snack or drink. Problem solved, for the next few minutes anyway.

Then we go to Target where I plan to return 3 items and come right back out. James suggests we all go in together. He knows shopping is my favorite gig ever and bumming around Target for clearance is quite high up there on my fun list and it's Mother's Day - a truly sweet suggestion James but I should have known better. We pile them all in the store and within a minute Caden has started his whining, grunting, "I'm irritated" noise - mostly due to the fact that we don't allow the pacifier to accompany him into buildings. And it's loud. And it receives stares (which truly DOES NOT bother me, but I want you be aware of what we're dealing with here). So we're trying to look for things here and there and during this time Caden wanders off twice - instant "into the cart" rule. And he isn't happy, so the whining crescendos. Long story short, we bought C batteries and toilet paper, James grabbed Caden and brought him to the van while I checked out with Avery and Declan (always the super troopers) and we headed home.

The ride home was pretty much silent. Caden fell asleep nearly immediately, Declan had napped a little bit and was content to chatter a bit to himself and Avery was singing, rather quietly which was nice. The silence was finally broken when I said to James, "Does it even feel to you like Caden ruins most of our family outings?" and James concurred. And that, my friends, is Really Tough Sh!t. It's the truth and the truth hurts. While I don't wish (anymore) for Caden not to have RTS (the syndrome), the truth is the wish is very much there for him to be more normal. I can't FATHOM what he would be like without RTS as it's the very essence of who he is, but I suppose I wish I could tailor RTS to suit our family's needs better. And can you even imagine, do you even KNOW how much it breaks a mother's heart to wish that your kid wasn't the way they are? To look at him, my heart adores him, but in the very same heartbeat, I want something different for him, for all of us. I want it to be FUN to go out and do things together as a family. I wish we didn't have to curb the things we do because Caden can't handle it, won't understand it, won't cooperate, doesn't understand consequence so there's no punishment that works...the list goes on.

And these are the moments where you feel very, very alone. James doesn't get it in the same way I do. He doesn't deal with him for as many hours as I do. And he isn't currently pregnant, either, which makes him a LOT more even-tempered, lol. Caden is ageless, in so many ways...I don't even think about what he would be doing as a typical 6.5 year old because I can't even imagine it. I tell people that I have a 6yo, 4yo and 16mon old and they say, "Oh, your 6 and 4yos will be a big help with the twins!" and I think, "No, no, no, he's honestly MORE work than the rest of them combined!!" but yet I just nod - what can you say?

I don't like asking for help with him. I feel like he's "my problem" - one I never asked for but apparently I needed. And he acts so dang good for others! At home it's where we have issues. I suppose that makes sense in terms of how we all behave differently at home and I am glad he's comfortable here obviously. It's just...different.

I'm throwing this all out there for heaven-knows-what reason. Some because I think I inadvertantly portray that everything's a-ok for us when it comes to Caden - and mostly, it is, but there are days, and then those days spiral downward so fast because it's all been building up. Some because these feelings are real and raw, and I think it needs to be ok to share them. And some because I just need a hug.

A year ago today...

Avery's potty training began. Remember that saga? That was fun to read. She is quite the Avery.

The reason I can even remember those sorts of details? Today is also my parent's wedding anniversary. Happy Anniversary mom and dad!! We love you!

Today Caden walked part of the parade route with his Kindergarten class. He was so cute in his Dutch costume. The rain cleared off and the weather turned out to be beautiful this afternoon so Tulip Time started off just fine! We are now done with our Tulip Time committments - time will tell if we go back uptown to do anything else. I know I'd prefer just to stay away from it all, but the food is truly calling me....

An overview of our life

My SIL (sister in law, for those of you who aren't internet lingo savvy) started a letter today that got the ball rolling for the rest of us. I thought I would share the portion we wrote to update all the rest of you!! --

Hey, I'll chime in. We're doing our usual - James nearly passed out in front of the tv and me parked at the computer. I really should have my feet up but alas, I do not. So sue me. If someone would buy us a laptop then I could do as I should and have my feet up. But alas, they have not. So sue them.

We found 6 wood ticks either attached to or near our children's heads tonight within the course of 30 minutes. That's disgusting, but it is just about our biggest news. So we do not have new pets, just new ticks.

I think we might go camping this weekend. Caden was supposed to be involved in 3 parades during Tulip Time but we have narrowed it down to only 1 parade on Thursday afternoon that he is involved in. So after that we're happy to be doing not much of anything at all. Time will tell if we go camping or not....we have loaded up the bed of the pickup with TONS of junk from around here so that has to go to the landfill before we can haul a camper to the campground. We joked that it would be funny to pull up in a crowded area of the campground with all that junk in there, spill all the kids out, start waddling around with my hands on my back and start yelling at James and the kids - wouldn't that be funny???? Yeah, only to us I think. But the mental picture is kinda funny.

School is winding down, and that means tons of field trips for Caden. He is going to the zoo with his spec ed class, then to the Youth Special Olympics (his best event is cycling, aren't you proud grandpa??), then to the zoo again with kindergarten...maybe. We'll see how he does with all of it and go from there. His last day will be June 2, barring any unforseen H1N1 battles (I try to be PC at every turn, you know, don't want any swines to be offended). Caden will be repeating Kindergarten next year, but isn't allowed to have the same K teacher (sniffle).

Avery only has 3 more preschool sessions left and then she graduates - back to the same preschool! Only next year she is doing 3 afternoons a week compared to the current 2 mornings a week. I have ABSOLUTELY no idea how it's all going to work out but I know God will make a way. After that the plan is that she will go to Kindergarten (in her words) "at Nathaniel and Emma and Tressa and Jacob's school!!!!!" and she is excited for Kindergarten when that time comes as well, but for now she is very content to go back to the same preschool, the house she knows, the teachers she "loves" (her words again) - and we are excited for her!

Declan. What can I say seriously? He melts you like a stick of butter on high in the microwave. He gets CRAPLOADS of attention when we go places - oh, he's so cute! How old? Oh, he WAVED at me!!! He is like a mini-celebrity and it's hilarious to me, not so fun to Avery but we are trying HARD to make sure she doesn't get lost in the shuffle of special needs older brother and super cuddle younger brother...and then indentical twin girls to follow up. He is a crawler now (FINALLY!) at 15 months and he goes places! Lately he's been sick with some crud and is back on breathing treatments but we hope he's turning the corner.

I'm feeling good! 28 weeks tomorrow and going strong, although I must admit that having a kitchen with concrete floor is MURDER on my back, legs and ankles by the end of the day. I am just nesting away, both inside and out and it's fun to see the progress, though at times the babes destroy it faster than I can clean it. Our pastor's wife gifted me with a certificate she won for 3 hours of cleaning service but I have no idea how to use it. Probably showers I guess, unless she's willing to change a diaper or two. That's truly dirty.

Caden's ears.

If you have a child with special needs, you soon come to realize that there is that "thing" that becomes the "thing" that's terribly frustrating. For Caden, medically speaking, that is ear infections. He is home again from school, day 2 now, with a high fever and lethargy. Most likely cause? Ears. And this is the 2nd round of it in as many weeks.

And I'm also annoyed at his ENT. I called them first to see if he could be seen instead of asking his regular doc to see him again. "It's too difficult to tell from your description if it's ears or not - but let us know if it IS his ears because we'll want to see him." ARGH! I truly DO know my son well enough to tell you what's going on but nope, they couldn't see us. So our regular dr (God bless that man) just called in a prescription for us and Caden seems better today.

In other news, I am 27 weeks today. Still feeling good, nesting like a CRAZY woman. Today I cleaned out the closet off the laundry room, cleaned the pantry (didn't organize yet, just cleaned it), sorted through all the craziness we call Tupperware (anyone need some onion holders? I am so a minced-from-the-jar kind of cooker) and cleaned out the cabinet where we put all the small appliances. Felt good, too! Avery and James spent the morning at preschool together - it was Ave's snack day and they had a good time.

A funny for your mid-week.

Hats off to my dear friend Mindi, the one girl who always knows what she sends into my email inbox will literally make me Laugh Out Loud!! This gem came from her:


Loving Couple -

A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary on the beaches in Montego Bay, Jamaica. Their domestic Tranquility had long been the talk of the town. People would say, “What a peaceful & loving couple.” The Local newspaper reporter was inquiring as to the secret of their long and happy marriage.
The Husband replied: “Well, it dates back to our Honeymoon in America,” explained the man. “We visited the Grand Canyon, in Arizona , and took a trip down To the bottom of the canyon, by horse. We hadn't gone too far when my wife's horse stumbled and she almost fell off. My wife looked down at the horse and quietly said, 'That's once.' We proceeded a little further and her horse stumbled again. Again my wife quietly said, 'That's twice.' We hadn't gone a half mile when the horse stumbled for the third time my Wife quietly removed a revolver from her purse and shot the horse dead.”
I SHOUTED at her, '”What's wrong with you, woman!?!”
“Why did you shoot the poor animal like that, are you frickin crazy?”
She looked at me, and quietly said, “That's once.”
“And from that moment on.... We have lived happily ever After.”

God never ceases to amaze me.

Had my regular 4 week appointment with the perinatologist this morning - mostly a fetal growth ultrasound. These little girls - verified girls once again - are doing PERFECTLY. They are active (baby B is quite a bit more rowdy than baby A) and they look wonderful. They are measuring just 2oz different from each other, which means they are both growing at nearly identical rates. Baby B is slightly bigger at 1lb 15oz and baby A is weighing in at 1lb 13oz. The level of fluid surrounding them looks good as well. I had tears in my eyes, I am just so thankful for God continually showing me that He is in control and He has a perfect plan for these double surprises. The perinatologist came in and literally spent about 30 seconds with me - "everything looks wonderful, your risk of twin-to-twin transfusion is nearly gone at this point, though we'll still watch carefully for that, keep on doing well and I'll see you in another 4 weeks." Hallelujah! So I've moved on to every 2 weeks with my regular doctor (mostly to keep good tabs on my blood pressure and thinks like that) and will have another growth ultrasound in 4 weeks.

In other news, please welcome little James (RTS) and his family to my blogroll! Head on over and visit his blog and tell me he doesn't look just like our Caden!

Had another appt on Friday

Things seem pretty normal I guess. We were able to find both heartbeats (this was just an appt with my regular dr, not with the perinatologist for an ultrasound and more in-depth look) and heard a lot of movement as well. I asked my dr if it was common to be more anxious when pregnant with twins about all the possibilities of things that might go wrong and he reassured me that it was more common. I felt better about that, but I am truly trying to give it to God and not fret about things - easier said than done! Anyway, I have been measuring about 2-3 weeks ahead but on Friday I measured 5 weeks ahead...and off I went in my head, thinking that must mean there's too much amniotic fluid for one twin (meaning twin to twin transfusion), etc. We'll see on Wed morning when I have my ultrasound, but I could use prayers that everything is just fine. I also had my glucose test Friday morning and passed with flying colors, although I am anemic and need to take an iron tablet daily. I can do that!

Things around the house are interesting. I have been nesting quite a bit and want to get to a place where I have nothing to do at night because I am *that* caught up. I know, I will give you a moment to stop laughing. However, several of my friends have been doing this lately and say it's so freeing. I can only imagine!! James has been a peach about pitching in lately and that is such a huge help to me, especially on those days when I am extra tired or extra grumpy, lol.

Caden is recovering nicely from his ear infection. I need to make an appt with his ENT to have his ears checked again, but sometimes I just don't FEEL like making more appts (and you RTS mommas know what I am talking about there). He went back to school on Friday and they said he did great, even went swimming with his special ed class. He's back to his usual self, antagonizing Avery at every turn. It's nice to have him back. (kinda??)

Avery is...something. We're not sure what is going on specifically, and maybe it's normal 4yo stuff, but she is a crybaby and she is DEFIANT lately. When things don't go her way we get 20 minutes of full-out sobbing about life in general. We get sass when the answer to her request is "no" - and then more crying. To be perfectly honest, it has spiraled downhill since we have been preparing for the twins. Everyone tells me "Oh, she'll be such a big help" but I gotta tell you, she might be my biggest challenge! It's such a fine line between letting her have her way so she's happy and laying down the law because she can't always have her way. I guess it's about choosing your battles, but sometimes I wonder why everything HAS to be a battle in the first place!

Declan is crawling. It's slow, but it's OH so cute. He started last week sometime in pursuit of a much desired sippy cup. It was worth the 15 month wait! He's also been half-standing near things lately so he's just sort of taken off all at once. He adores getting into cupboards and I let him - he is entertained and James can pick it up later, hee hee. He went through a spell there where he was pretty difficult, but I think it had more to do with not being able to motate and always seeing the same scenery. That's not an issue now!

Caden's got a bad ear infection.

Something hasn't been right since Sunday or so. They've been saying at school that he is very disagreeable to doing things, which isn't usual. Then last night he was awake until 9:30 crying and finally passed out on James' lap in front of 24 (I know, such good viewing for a 6 year old, sometimes that non-verbal stuff pays off). He was then up during the night sobbing. I sent him to school and he was agreeable about it, but I called after picking Avery up from preschool at 11:30 and was told that he wasn't himself at all and had been laying on a special person's lap for the past 45 minutes. Time for a call to the dr and to pick him up from school. Turns out, it's a nasty ear infection (and both ear tubes are out, oh joy, I think now we'll be going to tube set #4) causing him to be so sick, poor boy! I have had to carry him for most of the day, and at 45 pounds and me "great with child(ren)" that is no easy task. So he stays home tomorrow, and I had plans to get things done that I have been neglecting but such is the life. Can anyone run to Wal-Mart for me in the morning?? :)

Kristen's blog address:

If you'd like to follow Kristen and her identical twins, feel free to visit her blog at www.rockyrieman.blogspot.com (and can anyone tell me how to make that a clickable link????). Keep praying for them please!!

I haven't forgotten about you, blog...

I have just been busy with everything and nothing, all at the same time. You know how that goes? You don't have anything on the calendar, yet your days are full of "stuff." Add that to the fact that I have been nesting like a crazy-momma and we keep busy around here!

I finally talked Caden and Avery into watching The Polar Express and I am getting a few minutes' peace. Declan is napping, bless him. He's always been a very good napper, I'm glad of it and I hope it continues for YEARS, lol.

Twins are doing well. My blood pressure has risen a bit, and I have more protein and ketones in my urine than I should AND I've been losing weight. I had to go into the clinic twice this week to have that all checked, but for now we're just keeping an eye on things and I go for my next regular appt a week from today. I'll be glad to have my next ultrasound as well, just to check on them and see how they're doing. I don't feel a TON of movement, actually not more than I did with any of my first 3 singleton pregnancies, so at times it's easy to worry that something might be wrong. There's just lots of unknowns with a twin pregnancy I guess, and sometimes that's disconcerting, to say the least.

Please keep my friend Kristen in your thoughts and prayers. We met via searches on the internet - she lives in Wyoming and is also pregnant with twins (identical). Right now she has traveled over 7 hours to go to Salt Lake City because her twins are in the beginning stages of Twin-to-Twin Transfusion Syndrome. Keep praying that they will be able to help the twins grow strong and healthy!!!!

Think Caden's retarded?

You're right. Think it's ok to use the word "retard(ed)" outside of a medical description? You're wrong.

When you saw the title to my post I bet you wondered how to feel. You wondered if I was joking or if I was serious. I'm serious. Caden is considered mentally retarded. Problem is, in this society, which claims to embrace and encompass those with any kind of disabilities, the word "retard" has been changed to mean stupid, and is typically flung around as an insult at those with normal cognitive levels. No one wants to be CALLED a "retard" but yet it's fine to say "that's retarded" about something. No one wants to be CALLED a "retard" yet it's acceptable to say "you're retarded" if you're just joking around with someone.

Today, I am asking you to change the way you feel about this word. It's used as an insult, and it degrades those who are mentally handicapped. It's not "fine" to use it as long as you're not talking about a person, because it perpetuates the stereotype that people who are mentally retarded are somehow stupid and incapable. Let's end the use of this word altogether. If you use it, will you please stop? If you don't but you hear it used, are you brave enough to say something? Today, March 31 2009 is the day to end using the word "retard(ed)". It's not about being oversensitive. It's about respect for all. http://www.r-word.org/

You take the good with the bad!

No, I'm not talking about the facts of life. I'm talking about developmental milestones. They are wonderful little marvels to brag about and enjoy experiencing with each new child, but they are also intrusions into life as you know it.

Take today for example. Declan is now quite adept at getting from a laying position to a sitting position (it only took 14 months). Problem is, now he sits up in his crib instead of napping. Hey, isn't seeing the world from a sitting position more fun? He thinks so. He's been in there for nearly 1.5 hours and is still just talking away. He NEEDS to sleep, but I suppose I'll get to enjoy that later, around suppertime when he's a total bear to handle. He is growing increasingly frustrated at not being able to crawl around, but I think moving to the sitting position has built up confidence in him.

I told James around the 1st of March that Declan would crawl "this month". Well, unless he really gets a move on today and tomorrow that is unlikely. Wait, he's probably crawling all over in his crib right now and I have no idea!

And now onto my next random thought - decorating. I need some help with something. I got this beautiful mirror and thingys (are they sconces? I don't know what they're called but they hold candles I think - so candle holders? I'm clueless.) at a garage sale this past summer. James finally hauled out his tools and put them up for me:

Very nice above our fake fireplace (though last summer's appraiser listed that we indeed had a fireplace...I'm not sure where he received his credentials) but I'm wondering a few things. First, should I take the mirror out and paint them a bolder color? They seem really bland on that light tan wall. I don't feel like painting it but I would. Also, I am ordering red/white checked curtains for the windows (there are windows equally spaced on either side of the fireplace) so maybe that'll make this pop more. Also, what the heck do I stick on the candle holders? Before you laugh and shout out the obvious, keep in mind that these holders are curved throughout, so flat-bottomed candles won't work. I was thinking of some spheres that have greenery hanging down from them but again, where on earth to get them? Any ideas??

Edited to add a pic of the curtains I'm ordering:

Another ultrasound this morning!

Things look very good in there. It's just amazing to see what God is creating, changing every time! Today both twins are head down (hooray!) but through the course of the ultrasound they moved a ton, so head down was a matter of that moment in time. They are busy little girls! The perinatologist agreed that there has only ever been one placenta and everything still strong points to identical twins. I had to have my cervix length checked (it SOUNDS a lot worse than it is) and for those of you who might know, it was nearly 5cm (anything over 2.5cm is good, so again, hooray!). Baby A still has the 2 vessel cord but it doesn't sound like anything to be concerned about. They were laying so so so so close to each other, you could see they were both girls in one frame! The tech said that doesn't happen too often. Also wanted to add that I am 22 weeks today!

In other news, just before I came over to blog Declan was rolling around, and when I looked over at him a few minutes later he was sitting up! Yay! He's spending more time standing up too (with us holding him of course) and getting stronger with stuff like that. Still likes to scream and shriek and is very "talky".

Not much new to report with Caden or Avery. They seem to be just plugging along.

Kids and heaven

We've been talking recently around here about heaven. It makes sense, as James' grandpa (our kids' Opa) passed away at midnight last night (we will miss you Opa, we love how you loved kids), but interestingly enough, the first questions about heaven came in the car one day from Avery. Avery told me that she wanted Jesus to come to our house so she could give him a hug. I told her that wasn't the way Jesus came to us now, but he used to in the days of the Bible. That seemed to be ok with her, but she wanted to know where Jesus was if he wasn't able to come to our house...I mean, isn't he everywhere?? I tried to explain that he was in heaven but he also lives in our hearts, and again, that seemed to pacify her, but I could tell she wasn't satisfied completely.

Last night over our McDonald's dinner (hey, it's the only "meat" Declan will eat) we talked to the kids about how Opa was not going to live here on earth anymore. We told them that his body was very sick and that very soon, his body wouldn't be strong enough to stay here. God would choose the time and God would choose how it all happened, so we didn't need to worry about it. Avery insisted on going to make him feel better so that he would start to eat again and get well. We told her it didn't work that way, when God chooses for someone to die they will die, it's not up to us and there's nothing we can do.

This afternoon it came full circle. I told the kids this morning when we woke up that Opa had died. Several hours later, just a few minutes ago, Avery told me that Jesus was going to give OPA a hug, that's how it worked.

It's always amazing to me how God works in their hearts...to give us glimpses of him, to answer any lingering questions or doubts we may have, and to show us that children truly understand more than we even imagine.

So I thought my life was over...

turns out Iowa has changed their laws in July on how long you can wait until you need to renew your driver's license. I checked mine out yesterday while shopping and it expired March 7....2008!!!!!!!!! So when I got home I read everything I could find online (and you know that everything online is gospel) and they all agreed that in Iowa if you're over a year expired you have to take the written test AND the driving test to get your license back. I had visions of not driving for weeks. It took me THREE tries to pass it when I was a teen trying to get my license! This can't be good.

James in all his ever-frustrating-to-me calmness told me to relax, don't worry about it, you don't know what will happen, etc. So this morning I called our county seat's driver's license place. And, the regulations changed...you now have 1 year PLUS another 60 days to renew without having to take any tests again!! Oh I am just overjoyed!!!! Lesson learned. Please check the expiration date on your driver's license!

I have to document this - Declan.

He stood up today (I was holding him under his armpits and he was between my legs as I was sitting in the chair)!!!!!!! But he actually placed both feet on the floor and beared weight on those little chunkers for like 20 seconds!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Go Declan!

Have you missed me?

I feel like I've missed myself. We were gone over the weekend to Wisconsin Dells for the annual Midwest RTS reunion. It was honestly the most fun I've had in a long time as we could just relax and let the kids swim (the pool was wonderful for little ones because you didn't have to be in there with them) while we talked with other groovy grownups who also have RTSweeties! It was good for us to see Caden in his element - around tons of people who embraced him and loved him for exactly who he is. We both said we were very proud of him. We realize now that he is an EXCELLENT communicator. School has been telling us this, telling us that Caden tries in EVERY possible way to communicate and does eventually get his point across. He's very interactive, very VERY sociable. It was just fun to observe him! And his RTS brothers and sisters? Ahhhhhhhhhhhdorable.

The weather here just stinks. Sure, the days are longer but there's no sunshine and it's windy and FREEZING - literally. Who's ready for spring with me? Doesn't help that I am nesting already and wanting to get a TON done. When it finally warms up I will be too big and uncomfortable to do anything. Harumph.

Today is the halfway point of the dating of this pregnancy. I am 20 weeks today. Hard to believe it's only been 5 weeks since we found out it was twins, and just 3 weeks since we found out about them both being girls. It's especially hard to believe when you see the amount of clothing I have already accumulated. Now, in my defense a LOT of it has been gifts...turns out I am not the only one who thinks shopping for identical twin girls sounds like fun!