Monday, November 02, 2009

I kicked James out of bed again last night.

No worries about our relationship, but honestly we might have issues if these twins keep waking up at all hours of the night. It's driving us insane. I know babies are supposed to be unpredictable and all of that but dear lord, they are so inconsistent we might as well call them politicians.

So I kicked James upstairs to the bedroom to sleep in peace. Apparently I am able to snore through them screaming in stereo, so we deemed it most appropriate for me to remain in the same room with them. Things started off ok. We put them down around 7:00 and they were both asleep! And then it happened. It always does with them. They woke up. And they fussed and fretted, so finally at 8:30 we fed them again and put them down again. Macey fell asleep. Madelyn fussed until 9:30 when she finally fell asleep. And they were out for good. Which leads me to my first question - would you just let them cry at that earlier point until they fell asleep? They will be 4 months on Sunday.

And the night continues. At 2:30 they started crying. I'm not sure who woke up first, but they were both crying before I knew it. And I ignored it. And was able to sleep off and on for another hour. I know, you might think it's horrible but they were right next to me and no one was hurt. At 3:30 I got up and gave them pacifiers, which worked...for about 15 minutes. I finally succumbed and fed them at 4am. Success? Or failure? Again, what would you have done? They had already cried for over an hour at this point....

So yeah, they ate at 4 and I got Madelyn up to change her diaper as she was poopy. I know they were both wide awake at 4:30 when I went back to bed but I turned the light off and I did not hear from them, so I'm assuming they didn't cry too hard to go back to sleep after that. James fed Macey around 6:30 and Madelyn got a bottle around 7am. Not too bad but I'm just unsure of how to go about all of this. I'm serious, if you have advice (even if it's "you did this ALL wrong!") please let me have it. I've never done sleep training with a baby, let alone twins so I don't know how to do it best. I just can't decide if they are young enough that they need to be eating during the night like that or if I should let them cry it out (which I used to be totally against, now I just need my sanity) at various points during the night. Help!!!

8 comments:

Lynnae said...

OK, I'm way out of practice, but it seems like going from 8:30 to 4, without feeding is pretty good.

If I remember right, I used to do a really late night feed, so my kids would sleep later in the morning.

I did let my kids CIO, but I can't remember details.

Cindy said...

I think you're doing the right thing, having you take the night shift since you can sleep through their crying.

What I did is: before I went to bed, I set a time and said, "If he wakes up before this time, I'm letting them cry until time X." If I didn't have a plan before I went to sleep, I wasn't able to implement it with bleary eyes and semi-consciousness.

We used "Baby Wise" to train our kids to sleep through the night. If you're not using a book, the general principle is to stretch them out 15 minutes at a time, each night going longer between feedings.

Lukas slept 8 hours between feedings at 12 weeks...Konrad took longer because I didn't let him cry as much because of fear of waking the other kids...my fault and I paid for it in the end!

Also, it worked better for us to time the last feeding of the night at 10 pm, then the first feeding of the morning is closer to 6 am...but you'll figure out the schedule that works best for you.

The other thing I've found is that letting my child have a nap too soon after waking in the morning, means he woke too early in the morning. I.e., when I pushed his nap to 9 am instead of 8 am, then he slept in until 6 am instead of 5 am.

Hope this helps! It's going to be much more difficult because of twins waking each other up, but you're doing great!

Jo said...

I would definitely say that they can have a feed during the night at their age. Anytime after 3am is doing well in my books. I think from about 6 months (when they are on solid foods and having protein their diet) they dont need any feeds at night, but yours are still little to make it from 6.30pm (or so) til the morning. (Obviously there are those that sleep through from young, but certainly not my kids!). I used to give the evening bottle and then say no more milk until at least midnight. I would use a dummy or rock back to sleep til then. Gradually this got later and later, til it stretched to the morning feed. Good luck - I hope your nights improve soon....

Myssie said...

I was always told that once the baby doubles their birth weight then they should be able to sleep through the night.

Michelle said...

Do you turn the light on when you tend to them? I found that buying a dimmer switch for my lamp helped tremendously. The bright light from the lamp was fully waking Andrew up and once I switched, it was much better.

Alyssa Gaskill said...

breathe. This too will pass. They are still pretty young and you guys are doing a great job. Are they on cereal yet? once they get on cereal I bet they sleep longer. {{HUGS}}

Mark and Valerie Brandt said...

I wouldn't let them cry. I just can't. I really can't. Do what you need to, I will just choose to not read that blog. Of coure, I am sleeping through the night now, so that is easy for me to say. Mark would let them cry. He said so just now. They do need to eat during the night. naomi was eating during the night until she was 6.5 months old. She was breastfed, that might be different from your girly girls. Gretchen ate during the night until 17 months. we tried to let her cry one night and what a hellava night that was! NEVER AGAIN, we swore!!!! Have you considered that they don't need to go to bed at the same time? One may require more sleep than the other. G needs, oh 2 hours of sleep a night, while N needs 13 or more. So, totally different. Just because their DNA is identical doesn't mean their sleep patterns and personalities are...good luck, girlfriend.

Kristi said...

I give Nicholas (5months) a final bottle at night around 10 and generally he can make it until 6 or 7. I have to admit if he just fusses for a little bit in the middle of the night I let him do so. He generally falls back asleep. If he is full crying then I get up and feed him. At this point he does this at least twice a week.. It must be really hard with two. thinking of you.