Connecting with your spouse

I still have questions about this arena, and we've been married a while. Right now, James and I would love nothing more than to go away overnight for two nights: eat when we want, sleep when we want, talk without interruption and just basically do a whole lot of NOTHING. Because let's face it, when we'd come home (if we decided to) there'd be a whole lot of EVERYTHING to do.

We feel weekends away are crucial but it is just not a reality for us at this point in our lives. I mean I'm not blind, we've "done it to ourselves" by having more kids than is really necessary. (Yes, I did just say that I will will NEVER say who the unnecessary one/s is/are/mightbe.) The burden of asking someone to take 5 kids for a weekend is just, well, it's a lot. And we take it very seriously. That being said, we can't help but long for it because this is a season of our lives where it's not happening. We always want what we can't have. Just ask Declan (who turned 3 on Monday, had a "monkey cake!", and always, alllllways wants what he can't have).

Which brings me back to the title subject. How do you reconnect with your spouse when you have lots of children or when you maybe only have a few children but don't have reliable babysitting? And I want your feedback on this, because I want to know, too!

All too often after our kids are in bed (they are good about bedtime, everyone's down and out by 7:30 and no one makes surprise visits out to the living areas, bless them, I've scared them well) James and I just want to catch up on our favorite things and enjoy the silence. We've joked that our ears ring and almost hurt from the silence after our kids are in bed and that's really not too far from the truth. I tend to gravitate toward the computer (I know, you're shocked) and James grabs his iPod and crashes in front of the tv. We don't MAKE time to just be together, and this gets to be a problem. We miss each other, but we don't work at spending quality time together. So maybe, connecting with your spouse has a lot more to do with behaviors than it does with the knowledge of what to do to reconnect.

Some little things we do, in case you're looking for a little morsel of something from all this rambling:
1. We serve the kids supper first. Yes, they all sit down and eat around 4:50-5:00 while we run around like crazy getting refills and seconds and MORE APPLESAUCE PLEASE! Sometimes James will sit down with them and I'll do what James has named "The Negative Calorie Meal" - if I've eaten too many calories already during the day I won't eat and will just do all the running for supper. I actually burn calories during a meal and don't take a single one in. ANYWAY! We serve the kids first so that when they are done, WE can sit down together as two and eat food that's actually still hot and have a semi-decent conversation. We are able to chat entirely about the kids' days while they eat and we don't feel POed that we can't talk to each other. Win-win-win-winner on dinner!
2. We put a tv in our bedroom, and got an electric blanket for Christmas. It works for us. We're drawn to the bed because it's allllll cozy and warm, plus there's the added benefit of tv viewing, connected to our DVR so we can catch up on all the important shows. Lordie, we sound so pampered!

So there's some ideas to get the ball rolling. What do YOU do?

Two babies and a banana.

You'd swear I've never given my kids fruit. Ok, so I am terrible about it and I'm just now incorporating them into the twins' diet regularly. Sue me, they're 18 months old but I've been sorta busy - they had them as infants but I've gotten out of habit. My older kids eat them fine so I'm doing something right. Annnnnyway yeah, just now giving them to the twins.

Madelyn has this *precious* habit of taking whatever she doesn't like and throwing it straight to the floor. To be more correct, she actually takes whatever she doesn't THINK she'll like (without sampling) and throws it straight to the floor. Macey will usually just politely ignore it and eat all around it. I'm appreciative of Macey at mealtimes.

So a few days ago I introduced banana at a snacktime. They both sampled - Macey put it back on the tray without sampling again and Madelyn's taste buds can apparently decide in .05 seconds that she doesn't like banana. Down to the floor it went. I ignored. I tried again yesterday morning at breakfast. To my amazement, Macey sampled again - and she liked it! She is eating banana with no problem! Which leads us to Madelyn...

She tosses. And tosses. And honestly if you put it on her tray before anything else, she will become angry with you. Downright honked off, thank you very much. I tried that this morning at breakfast and she.was.mad. I guess I just keep trying!

We go to their 18 month well-child checkups this morning! I'll update with how they're doing later. Ta-ta!

A teacher who believes in your SN child...

is worth more than any gift I've ever been given. Caden's 1st grade teacher this year is nothing short of phenomenal. I literally just hung up the phone from her calling me to tell me about some big successes Caden has had in the classroom. They (the students) were going around in a circle, telling her what sound each letter group made - ir, or, etc. It came to Caden's turn and he had "er". He nailed it. They went around again and he nailed it a second time. No fluke. Came around again and she challenged him with a new one - qu. "Qwah," said my boy!!!! I literally have tears running down my face. She just believes in him so much! She said she just feels so confident he is going to read. I'm so excited about that, too!! I just feel so blessed, so very blessed that God has given us this amazing woman to spend the year with him. He's doing so very well!!

Happy 2011!

I just can hardly believe it. 2010 was a great year really, aside from whooping cough, multiple hospitalizations, job changes, money uncertainty...ok so it really wasn't that awesome.

However! I did lose 50 pounds in 2010 so that's awesome!

I'm excited about 2011. I plan to lose as much weight as possible (another 75 is my goal) to reach my goal weight. I want to see the twins (finally) start walking! I want to see sir Declan potty train. I want so many things and we'll see how God sorts it all out!

I am not the kind to make New Year's Resolutions. Mostly that's because I never want to be disappointed! But I can promise you this much - I am determined to make 2011 a year that I remember...for lots of good things!